Not good today. My head has felt like its going to explode for most of the day. I’ve tried my best, but have admitted defeat. I even got myself out of the house and went to the gym, but I could only manage an hour before I felt exhausted. Which I have to admit, is more than enough, but my perfectionist wasn’t happy at all, so I came away feeling deflated.
When I got back I felt like acting out, so I did. I really tried not to view it as failure but ultimately the shame came. The though of going to another meeting and admitting that I had slipped again was too much. My head was pounding, my chest wanted to burst and I had no energy to move. I gave in, took 2 paracetamol and stayed in.
Today has been pretty bad, but failure is only an opportunity to begin again with more wisdom than before. Hopefully another good nights sleep and a fresh start tomorrow.